There have been rumors of a dark force rising on the court, namely my son, Will “Shaqobe/Big Man Junior” Tashman. Many praise his ability to run faster, jump higher, shoot more accurately, and even dunk (which I could do if I chose to). Some have even gone so far as to pass the ball to him instead of ME, how dare you! Do not confuse the apprentice with the master. If you want to pass to Will, check with me first.
And remember, I control his ability to drive, so he isn’t going anywhere (much less the gym) if I don’t want him to.
PASS ME THE BALL!!!
Rants from the Big Man 